by Tad Lindley
M
y wife’s family is one of the best things that ever happened to me in my life. My father-in-law taught me so much through the years, and I dearly miss him. The rest of the family has always welcomed me and been a great blessing. So I am not writing this from experience in case you were wondering, but I know enough people to realize that situations like the one you are about to read about still happen even in 2023.
But Saul was psycho
David was married to King Saul’s daughter. In most cases this would be a good thing. David got to eat at the king’s table, he enjoyed the power and privilege of being a part of the royal palace, but there was a problem: Saul was a psycho. He was insanely jealous of his son-in-law and tried to kill him multiple times.
Tries to kill David with a spear
This was after David killed Goliath, but before he married the king’s daughter:
The very next day a tormenting spirit from God overwhelmed Saul, and he began to rave in his house like a madman. David was playing the harp, as he did each day. But Saul had a spear in his hand, and he suddenly hurled it at David, intending to pin him to the wall. But David escaped him twice. (I Samuel 18:10-11 NLT)
Then tries to kill him with his daughter
Later on Saul tried to trick David into getting killed by telling David he could marry the king’s daughter if he traded him 100 Philistine foreskins:
Then Saul replied, “Say this to David: ‘The king desires no other bride-price except a hundred Philistine foreskins, to take revenge on his enemies.’ ” Actually, Saul intended to cause David’s death at the hands of the Philistines. (I Samuel 18:25 CSB) David was so tough that he went out and killed 200 Philistines instead and showed up to Saul alive and traded the foreskins for his new wife, thus becoming the king’s son-in-law.
Then with a spear again
And Saul sought to smite David even to the wall with the javelin; but he slipped away out of Saul’s presence, and he smote the javelin into the wall: and David fled, and escaped that night.
(I Samuel 19:10 KJV)
Sending hit men to kill David
Saul sent agents to David’s house to watch for him and kill him in the morning. But his wife Michal warned David, “If you don’t escape tonight, you will be dead tomorrow!” (I Samuel 19:11 CSB) I might add at this point, that Saul was so crazy, that he also tried to kill his own son, Jonathan, for helping David escape. Weapon of choice: spear. (I Samuel 20:33)
Hunting David down with the army
Finally David had had enough narrow escapes from being murdered by his father-in-law, that he fled. During this time King Saul went after David with his army. They chased David and his group of about 600 men, hoping to trap them and kill them. It was during this time that David had two times when he could have very easily killed his father-in-law, but he didn’t.
1- A dump in the darkness
The first chance that David had to kill Saul was in a cave at the sheepcotes of Engedi (I Samuel 24). David and his men were hiding in a cave. Saul went into that very same cave alone to defecate out of sight of his soldiers. David snuck up to Saul in the dark, took out his knife, and silently sliced off a hunk of Saul’s royal robe. When Saul walked out into the daylight, David followed and called out to him, showing Saul the piece of the robe he had cut off as proof that he had no intention of harming his father-in-law.
2- A stolen spear and a water bottle
Once again Saul was out chasing David in the wilderness. At night David came into Saul’s camp. All of the soldiers were asleep. David came upon his sleeping father-in-law and could easily have killed him, but instead, David took Saul’s spear and his water bottle. Once he was safely outside their camp, he called out and woke them up, showing his father-in-law the spear and water bottle.
Why didn’t David kill him?
By the norms of his culture it was expected that David would have killed Saul. Anyone would probably consider this a reasonable act of self-defense. But David was a man after God’s own heart, and twice he refused to kill his father-in-law. In spite of the mental illness of his father-in-law, David chose to deal with him through forgiveness. He specifically felt an obligation to honor his father-in-law’s position even when the man himself was a mental mess. Instead of fighting back, David separated himself from Saul and did his best to honor him.
The crazy people in your life
If you happen to be troubled by crazy people in your life, take a lesson from David. It is not our duty to crush our enemies. Jesus told us, “But I say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you.” (Luke 6:27-28 NKJV) David embodied this, and you can too!
Reverend Tad Lindley is a minister at the United Pentecostal Church in Bethel, Alaska.
