by Tad Lindley
The man’s name was Nabal, and his wife’s name was Abigail. The woman was intelligent and beautiful, but the man, a Calebite, was a hard man and an evildoer. (1 Samuel 25:3 JPS)
His true colors
Many times, after the cake is eaten and the well wishers have gone on their way, the newlywed couple is alone together for the first time. Having primped and preened themselves during their courting, all that is passed, and the true colors begin to show.
In the case of this couple, the woman was smart and attractive. As the wedding faded into the past, it became apparent that the husband was neither. The groom in fact lived up to his name, Nabal, which literally means stupid, wicked, or foolish.
Why she couldn’t just go Hollywood and divorce him
In American culture, the answer to this is simply to divorce the undesirable spouse and look for another. For a Hebrew woman this was not an option (Deuteronomy 24). Nor did Jesus permit it, except in the case of adultery (see Matthew 5:31-32, Romans 7:2-3). So our intelligent and beautiful woman Abigail was stuck. (This does not mean that you are to simply be a punching bag for a violent husband. Separation may be necessary in such cases to save your own life).
Godly woman with a gross husband
Abigail faced two outcomes in her life. The first was to join her husband in his foolishness. She might have chosen to become embittered at the world and let her heart become as hard as her husband. Abigail could have soured over the years and become empty herself.
Instead, this lady did not compromise. She held fast to what she knew was right. In spite of the ugly self-centered attitude of her spouse, she maintained her beauty. She is the one who continues on living for the Lord while her husband is drunk and serving only his own selfish desires.
Black eye and all
Abigail is the kind of woman who picks up the pieces Sunday morning, puts on a pair of sunglasses and heads out the door to church, black eye and all. Abigail is the woman who continues to do what is right even though she has every excuse to do what is wrong. In our Bible story, Nabal had a debt to King David. Nabal refused to pay the debt. David ordered Nabal and his household destroyed. Abigail refused to let her household go down, because of her husband’s poor decisions. While her husband insisted on doing what was wrong, she took care of his debt, and thereby saved the household.
Checkmated by marriage?
Some of you who read this might feel like the devil has you completely checkmated. Married to a physically or verbally abusive man or woman, your house has become a prison. Even a trip to the store can seemingly provoke your husband’s wrath for days. Maybe you gave up city league prematurely to avoid your wife’s constant accusations of infidelity. Long ago you may have rejected the hope of ever living a normal life. Your situation may have become so bleak, that you have begun to believe their lie that you are the cause of the way they treat you.
Abigail’s marriage ended like this
Jesus wants you to be free. He spoke these very words about you, “I have come that they might have life and have it more abundantly” (John 10:10). I want you to realize that the same God who raised up Moses to lead his people out of Egypt, the same God who spoke this very world into existence, and the same God who was manifest in the flesh as Jesus Christ cares about your situation. Your circumstances do not have to destroy you.
When Abigail did what was right, God delivered her and her household from certain death. Not only that, he set her free from the prison of her life with Nabal. You can read your Bible to see what happened. It was not a happy ending for Nabal, and Nabal’s death grieved even God (Ezekiel 18:32), but Abigail went on to become a queen.
Jesus wants to save bad husbands, not kill them
Is God looking to take out your spouse in the same way? No. God wants to save both you and your spouse (II Peter 3:9). I am reminded of a testimony given by a missionary to Africa, Brother Crumpacker. One of the ladies in the church in Malawi, Africa was able to save up enough money for a bottle of cooking oil. She would sell a cup at a time. Eventually she had a tiny store in her home. One night her husband gathered up all of the items in her store, walked down to the bar, set them on the table, sold them, and drank up all the money. She built it back up over time and he did the same thing again. In spite of horrible circumstances, this woman did not give up on God. She hung on to the promise that her husband might be won by her godly living (I Peter 3:1-2). Eventually her husband too repented and was baptized in Jesus’ name. He received the promise of the Holy Ghost and went on to live for God.
Seek the Lord diligently, and he will bring you out of darkness into his marvelous light.
Reverend Tad Lindley is a minister at the United Pentecostal Church in Bethel, Alaska.
