The constant presence of grief

photo by Greg Lincoln

by Greg Lincoln

Grief is like a guest in your home. It lives with you, it eats with you, it is there when you go to bed, when you wake. It even comes with you when you go to work, or when you travel out of town for business or for whatever it is you need to do.
It goes with you into the maqii, it is there when you are washing dishes, it even goes with you when you go to church or when you are out picking berries. It is there with you in the most unlikely places – in the dentist’s chair, or at the store when you are grocery shopping.
It follows you wherever you go, it is your constant companion. How creepy that sounds, but it is not creepy at all. Grief comes from the love you so deeply feel for your beloved one that you yearn for. Grief is the love that you feel for the person that you are wanting when you are bereaved.
When you are alone, when you have time to think, or when there is a long lull without any activity to distract you, is when those feelings come out and those memories come back and you feel overwhelmed.
Sometimes grief follows you when you sleep and it is in your dreams.
When you cry, grief is right there with you. It is the lump in your throat that rises along with the tears welling up in your eyes. It is what makes you get down on your knees and pray to God, pleading for the comfort and peace that you so long for.
There is always the hope of peace.
Sometimes, sometimes, we leave grief behind, maybe in a forgotten corner, just for a little while when we find ourselves in the midst of others, laughing, feasting, socializing. But it is always patiently waiting, always ready, because your love endures. As long as you love, so you will always have grief.
Have you ever thought about that?
How should we talk to one who has lost a child? Do we not even mention their name for fear of making them sad all over again? No, don’t be afraid to let them know that you think about them. When you do that, you are not reminding us of our loss – we know, we always know, it is always on our minds, it is all we think about, every hour of the day, every minute, down to every second that has ever ticked by on the clock. You are not reminding us of why we are sad, we already know.
So, by all means, let us know that you are still thinking of them, still loving and cherishing them in your thoughts, and that you are keeping them alive in your memory. To us that is like a precious gift, a prize of great worth, a wonderful gem.
When you do that, we know that in your own way that you miss her too.
Friends, we are continually grateful for you and all that you have done for us as we continue to publish the Delta Discovery each week. Do you have a friend in need? Yes, we all do because loss is all around us. Please continue to lift each other up in prayer and through your kind deeds. Quyana.