The comfort of children

photo by Greg Lincoln

by Greg Lincoln

It makes our hearts flutter with gladness when we hear our children laughing during these days as we struggle to survive after the loss of our beloved dearest one. This laughter comes when they are enjoying each other’s company while doing everyday things – chatting, eating, playing a game, being together.

To us, it is so beautiful, so comforting, so amazing.

These happy sounds bring forth wonderful memories of when we were whole. It brings tears to our eyes to hear them because they too miss their sister so very much. They too are continuing on their own journeys of healing.

She was the one in the middle, the one in between the eldest and the youngest, like a bridge connecting them together. They all sound the same, they talk the same, their voices are like the voices of the others. They have the same experiences, the same past, the same loved ones and friends, the same beloved pets, the same lives.

Together they share the same family bonds, the same memories, the same unique genetics, their lives are so intertwined, connected by their shared flesh and blood. As siblings they have experienced a different kind of closeness with one another, a special connection that us as parents can see and feel. Their departed sister lives on through them and that will never ever change.

We did not know that we had it so good.

We wish with all our being that they didn’t have to suffer this kind of trauma in their young lives. Siblings should be able to enjoy a life with each other until they are old and elderly. They have to bear this grief upon their tender hearts with all their strength – longer than Kelly and I are destined to since they are still so young. Their sorrow has pierced us with pain upon pain, and it still does to this very day.

We have learned that love never goes away, it never grows cold, it is always here. Bittersweet memories that we made together will always be with us, we will never forget them. The years can roll on by and we will always know and feel the love we have for each other. Time cannot and will not take that away. And when we are old and gray, those memories will still be with us.

As each new day comes, we are thankful for your steadfast prayers and good thoughts for our family. We love and cherish the cards with the heartfelt notes that you have sent us – we cry tears of love for you and with you when we read them, they touch our broken hearts. Thank you for the emails and messages of encouragement and the gifts of your strength that you have shown through your friendship, quyana. You are helping us so much! Thank you Lord for friends!

Bereavement is hard on a person, it makes you so weak and tired. The overwhelming sadness permeates you and you need someone to always be there for you.

Please continue to be compassionate and loving to those who have lost their loved ones. They miss their sister or brother, or mom or dad so very much. The pain of yearning they feel hurts deeply, treat them with gentleness and share in their sadness – it will mean a lot. Pray for them for comfort and healing and many blessings to you all during this Christmas season.